From My Road Trip Journal/Washington State – May 30th. 09
Hello Friends,
“On the road again, I just can’t wait to get on the road again….” Yeah. Right! Not ready for this trip so soon after the last one. I have to tell you . . . if I didn’t adore my granddaughters sooo much, I’d skip this trip. Danny and I are both still exhausted and grumpy from the long trip East. We keep telling ourselves that the girls only get to graduate from high school once in their lives, so we can do this!
On the trip to Washington State, Danny and I are familiar with the hotels, eating spots and pulls offs for the dogs as we have made the trip many times. The first night of our trip, we stayed at Tonopah in Arizona. It’s a rustic and trustworthy little town in the middle of the wind blown desert, with friendly people and a place to relax for the night. I always marvel at the town that once . . . must have been a thriving mining town. I try and imagine the Dickens-like characters that must have evolved out of the area. I try and picture the tough old bearded miners, and the women that accompanied their men. I wonder about the children who were born there, and the families that once occupied the crumbling buildings that encompass the main street area of the town. You can almost hear the whispers of the thriving little city, as it once must have been- full of color, hope, and bustling with activity. I also find myself reflecting on the overcrowded cities in America, and telling myself that there is land and a vastness, still untouched and undeveloped. There is room to grow.
The dogs adjusted to the traveling again with their normal ‘Oh well, we could have been left at home, attitude’. They were with us and that’s what counted to them. They’re great little travelers. Lady Bug stays awake all day, waiting for us to get into a hotel and spread her blankie on the bed before collapsing into a dead weight sleep. Cubby Bear sleeps all day, waiting until night to guard the hotel room (and us) against potential boogiemen and such. They’re as full of character as the little town we’re staying in for the night.
I walked the dogs late into the darkness behind our hotel that evening, overlooking the town, and reflected upon the universe in general. The stars were spread out before me on the vast horizon, a plethora of small lights, winking at me as if a joke was about to unfold, and I’m going to be somehow unmasked, only to discover how small I really am in comparison to the rest of the vast universes of time. I always feel humbled when I look into the night skies, and realize I’m but a minute small piece of an emerging puzzle that’s me, with a grander plan yet to unfold. As I age I realize how little I really know and how far I have to go to become a whole entity. I can only hope that there’s more time in the vast universes for growth, as I sense the time I’ve lived so far, is nothing in comparison to what is to come.
This I know and keenly sense as I stared longingly at the stars spread out so masterfully before me in the darkened skies. “I am,” I prayed, “but a small molecule within a larger mass of breathing matter. It knows all, and sees all, but I have a voice if I care to be heard and exert my free will to do so. The true path is spirituality, and the only way to truly experience growth is to keep our eyes toward the light. Everything else is purely an experience of humanism in this life, and the only true spiritual and lasting path of growth is through God.”
The second night we make it into the small town of Weeds, California. Weeds is at the base of Mount Shasta. Magic reins unchecked in this small part of the universe, as we were soon to discover. We checked into the hotel for the night, and went back downtown to eat at the local-yokel restaurant where the food and hospitality are famous. The menus are a history of the town and of the mountain, standing majestically and powerfully above the entire township. The mountain seems to be a power source of pure energy. If the mountain were shrouded completely in heavy clouds, you’d still feel her force.
Danny bought a “Weeds, California” hat for his collection. I, on the other hand, was fascinated by the author of the menu, who claimed that UFO’s were a mainstay within and around the mountain, and that UFO’s had been seen by most who dwelled within the community and surrounding area. Rumors were that a door existed within the towering mountain, that could only be seen when the sun hit the mountain . . . just so! UFO’s were thought to come and go from within the mountain door. I loved the thought of aliens living just a few miles from where I sat, perhaps watching the coming and goings of the town. “Hi there! It’s me!”
Morning brought a streaking of light and mist around the hotel compound area. I had completely forgotten about the mountain and the door leading into the mountain. As we pulled away from the hotel I turned to the right, (to look for oncoming traffic) and the mountain was THERE! Its magnificence blasting into my brain! The beauty of it was beyond words. Clouds were shrouding the mountain, like wispy wrappings of soft cotton candy. Suddenly, the sun became a brilliant diamond, casting its morning rays against the mountain, sending off an aura of diamond-like prisms. The mountain was actually unfolding like a glorious treasure in front of our eyes, and . . . as the sun touched the inner niches and valleys of the mountain, it opened its secrets to the naked eye. Almost like a huge hand from a powerful force, the sun snatched the fog from the mountain and it was laid bare. Danny and I sat in the Big Boy truck and watched in rapture as the sun moved it’s rays around the mountain, lighting up Her face as a giant hand of bright energy erased all traces of fog from her majestic form. Lo and behold! We saw “the door”. Imagine it! We saw a large door entering into the mountain. For a brief second, we saw it! Danny jumped out to take a picture of the phenomenal moment with his cell phone, and I stared in rapture at the unfolding golden moment.
The phone picture failed to gather in the majesty of the moment, but I know my brain fused with the magic, and I’ll always have it within the cells of my brain matter. The door into the mountain was observed so fleetingly by us both, that I can’t even imagine in retrospect if we truly saw it, or just a phenomenal moment of shifting sun as it moved across the face of the mountain. No matter, it was a feel good spiritual moment, and one the two of us will treasure forever.
We arrived at our son and daughter-in-law’s home to a flurry of activity that began, and ended, only when we drove away from the graduation party days later.
The Graduations:
Gary and Susanne’s girls graduated from high school on June 7th at the Olympia Dome in Washington State. Both girls graduated with high honors, and were very active in sports throughout their school years. Both attended college in their senior year, so . . . graduating from high school seemed to them to be just another milestone for moving forward into the world.
Katala married her long time boyfriend while we were in Maine on vacation. It was a sudden decision for the two of them as he had been accepted into the Air Force, and they decided to get married before he left for boot camp. It was a surprise to everyone in the family. Since I married young, had kids, and then attended college, I carried little weight in terms of making an impression on her that she was too young. Best to stay out of some things and charge it up to “youthful choices”, and . . . pray like a good grandparent that it will work out for the two of them in the long run.
Seeing and listening to “Katala being married” was different for Danny and I though . . . to have her married and into the world of adult choices and moving away from home and following her new hubby to his new destination was a leap. She seemed to go from carefree teen to married woman in less than a month and life had changed in that brief time span for her . . . forever!
Jessica is still attending college and will become a nurse. She worked during her senior year and attended high school and college. She is focused and sure of her vocation. She also has a long time boyfriend, but has the marriage thing worked out for after she graduates from college.
Their youngest child, Triston, is now the “teen at home” of the wolf pack. He’s seventeen and feeling like he’s more than ready to be twenty (with all the privileges that go with it). He’s physically fit, handsome, and his hormones are raging. I’m really glad we raised our boys a long time ago and don’t have to go through that age again. It’s tough being 17 and the baby of the family. He’s my spirited grandson though, and I have to admit, I do love his little power plays and games. It’s interesting to me to watch, but I’m positive Gary and Susanne doesn’t find his game playing and womanizing that fascinating at all! I remember when our boys were that age. Their antics weren’t funny then, and they survived! But when it’s unfolding, it’s a nightmare.
The Food and Parties:
Gary and Susanne threw at least three or four parties while we were there, along with huge BBQ breakfasts. Danny was in pig heaven as far as breakfast was concerned. Relatives on both sides flew in from as far away as Vermont for the girl’s graduations. We got to meet Susanne’s dad and his partner, and tons of other friends of both of them. Gary is an electrical lineman like his Dad, and his Buddies and Danny talked line talk ’til the cows came home most nights, sitting around the outdoor blazing fire pit! Carolynn (our daughter) and Lauren (granddaughter) flew in from California to be there too. It was a massive party for six days running. A professional photographer was hired to take pictures of the big graduation party, and took hundreds of pictures of family and friends. Shopping, gossip, eating, drinking, and outdoor games abounded. There were literally wall-to-wall people everywhere on the property. I can’t even imagine how the two parents managed the entire fling. It was an astronomical undertaking. Thank the Saints that the girls only graduated once!
Danny and I stayed in the apartment above the garage. It’s a lovely place, fit for a queen and king. Makes visiting private, but intimate at the same time. We had a wonderful time and left a few days early as I was truly tired to the bone. I felt like I couldn’t socialize for one more day. It was time to go home.
On the way back to Arizona, I began to feel a little better. I knew my blood levels had soared, and I needed to sleep and rest, and I did.
Near Weeds California, Danny and I were watching two gigantic rainbows crisscrossing the sky. It was an amazing sight. Then, all of a sudden, (from what seemed like out of nowhere) both of the rainbows suddenly appeared in the sky directly in front of us. The closer we got to them with the truck, the larger they seemed to pulsate and glow. The colors were awesome and spirit-like. Then, instantly, we both knew! We were going to actually drive very close or maybe even between the two rainbows.
Then, like magic . . . another turn of events occurred, and the two rainbows suddenly merged and turned into one towering molecular force of pulsing color and we knew we were going to actually experience driving within its collective force for the first time in our lives. The rainbow was so huge that the beginning and the end seemed infinite in scope. The inside of the truck seemed to slow down as we moved into the heart of the rainbow, (like a slow moving movie of color and swirling fog) and the crystal-like prisms from the rainbow were jumping all over the inside and outside of the truck. There were actual ripples of color moving in slow motion across the hood of the truck. I have never seen such glorious colors. I turned toward the backseat and saw that the colors were in the back of us as well, rippling over the dogs and the windows. It was a surreal moment. The experience was akin to a spiritual palette of color that was actually merging with our human energies. It’s one thing to see color in one dimension, but the colors surrounding the truck and us were fifty dimensions. Both of us just looked at one another after we had passed through the rainbow in absolute wonder. Words would have been inadequate. It was truly a golden moment of something indescribable and rare. Something delicious beyond description that we only refer to in the after-thought in hushed and awed voices. We’ve wondered about the time line of the rainbow and how long we were embraced by it, and for both of us, time seemed to stand still and last an eternity. We still get a glazed look in our eyes when we talk out loud about the rainbow experience.
Back Home and Down To The Mayo – July 14th, 2009
Back home and rested, we made preparations to plant the roses that we held off planting until the last of the road trips were finished. It was nice to put the finishing touches onto the backyard, and begin the process of watching the flowers begin their growth process. Nothing feels like home more than a yard full of beautiful flowers growing and prospering.
My Mayo trip was just for blood tests this time, and my blood levels were still at the same range as the previous visit. The nodes had increased again though, and I will begin chemo after my next scans and blood tests in October. My doctor would have begun chemo immediately, but I wanted to deal with cooler weather in Scottsdale. Heat and I don’t get along. I figure chemo is tough enough without adding heat. I’m ready as can be expected for the chemo treatments. It’ll take six months. Three days per month. The treatments should shrink the nodal system down so that I’m more comfortable. It definitely won’t cure the leukemia from sending out the negative and deformed B cells, but at least we can kill the zillions of cells that have accumulated in the nodal sacs throughout my lymphatic system. Some of my nodes are so large that they’re protruding into areas that cause a lot of discomfort and they’ve becoming very painful. The chemo treatments should allow me a window of two years, before having to empty out the lymphatic system again. The problem of course is . . . as the leukemia worsens over time, (becomes more active and aggressive) the process of chemotherapy becomes more difficult to find the right treatment of drugs that’ll work to kill the B cells as they find a way to become stronger that the previous drugs given. They adapt! Mean little suckers!
Until next time,
Love, Jaye Bartlett