MOTHERS ROCK OF AGES
Mother’s Day is fast approaching, and before I get too busy and forget to write about all the wondrous mothers in the world, allow me to remember why we love our moms so much. First of all, moms are spectacular peacemakers. For the most part, they’d rather make peace than war. That’s one of the reason I feel a woman president is needed in our country. (At least let’s give it a try!)
I remember when we were little kids and one of us would rub another of our siblings the wrong way, and tempers would eventually flare into screaming matches. Our mother would then intrude into the fight and ask us in simplistic tones . . . “Just who’s the adult here, and who’s the child?” Sounds silly, but it sure made me stop and think.
Another of her favorite sayings was when we’d get up in the morning and had a grumpy or whiny beginning, for one reason or another. She’d tell the wayward child sternly, “Why don’t you try going back to bed and getting up on the right side?” These weren’t idle threats, she actually sent us back to our beds, and we went in shame and defeat. I, at least . . . tried getting out of bed on the right side after being sent back upstairs to find the . . . “right” side of the bed. Until, of course, I learned the punishment was partly a metaphor. Not really real! But the message was still there. “It’s just as easy to begin your day in a good mood as a bad one.” I remember yelling down to her. “I think I’m on the right side of the bed now.” She’d always allowed us out of bed to come downstairs to join the rest of the family, but her little “right side of the bed” could be likened to the “time outs” of children today. It worked!
Our mother was also a stickler about reading books and caring about the many books that graced our home. I think she read us probably a thousand books, which took us to far away lands and imaginations. It was a great gift, and all her six children and most of the neighborhood kids who came to hear her read the many stories are readers and lovers of words today. Because of our mother’s love of books, I continue to have books everywhere around our home and spend a lot of time with my nose in a book. We always had hundreds of books around our house and were encouraged to read, read, and read some more. My mother’s mother, my grandmother, had as many books around her home as our family did, and it was evident where our mother received her love of books. I passed the love of reading and buying great books on to our children, and I notice when I visit them, they also have tons of books to read for their children.
Another of our mother’s great gifts was her encouragement of our attending Church and Sunday school. It was our day to give thanks and learn about God, His mighty heroes and prophets of old, and His many churches and . . . best of all, to dress up in our Sunday’s finest. We were never forced into spiritual attendance or beliefs, but I dearly loved going to church, singing the olden hymns, and smelling the old wooden pews and cavernous building, with its scents of cleaning oils and its history of births, weddings, deaths and rebirths. When the old church bell rang, I remember feeling a thrill clear down to my toes. It was like being called to the service of the Lord. Hard to describe today, but I still seek and embrace a deep, abiding faith, going back to those early days of my childhood.
Lastly, and most important to remember this Mother’s Day , is a mom’s unconditional love. That specialness is something you learn about early on in life. Loving another human unconditionally is not just a small gesture or act of love, it’s something my mom taught us as an “extra addition” to just plain love. She taught by her example that unconditional love is the act of loving and caring for your children, even when we were not at all easy to love. We all, certainly (in my estimation and at times) . . . and in our worst moments, were not very lovable at all! And believe me, we all at one time or another, found that . . . not so easy to be lovable space in our lives. But mom never wavered in her faith of her children or her unconditional love for us. Sometimes, I felt she may have loved us too much (if that’s possible). When it came time for me to deal with those difficult times with my own children, I believe I fulfilled the unconditional love portion of being a mom, because I learned how to accept unconditionally, love from my own mother throughout my own life.
Life wasn’t perfect in our childhood household. Sometimes it was far from great, but the one thing all six kids received was that unwavering and unconditional love from our mother. In those moments of difficulty and trying times, she managed to show us we were loved. For me, that was . . . and still remains . . . her greatest gift.